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Avoiding Reader Confusion
- Part II:
What, Where, When and
Why
By Marg
Gilks
The story playing out in your
mind -- the one you're writing down -- isn't the same one your
readers will "see," unless you share with them the details
that make the story work for you.
In Part One of
Avoiding Reader Confusion we covered Who; now we're talking about What, Where, When and Why. In
other words, about scene and setting, motive, and plot.
When
Did That Happen?
In terms of setting,
when and where are tied together. I mentioned in Part One that
"talking heads" stories often confuse by neglecting
Who; they can also confuse readers
when it comes to Where and When. But any story can confuse its
readers if the author neglects to indicate a scene break.
Let's say your
reader has just spent seven paragraphs following along with Buffy
and Jody as they interact. The reader starts paragraph eight,
expecting more of the same, when -- whoa! Jody is now discussing
Buffy's death with a Swahili witch doctor! The reader is left
reeling: when did Buffy die? "When" in the chronology
of the story did Jody start talking to the witch doctor, and where
did this witch doctor come from, anyway? And where is Jody now,
to give him occasion to talk to the witch doctor?
Now, if this
were your plot, I would certainly hope that you'd reveal the details
of Buffy's death to the reader at some point later in the story.
That aside, all you have to do here to warn the reader of a change
is to indicate a scene break. Start a new chapter, or insert a
blank line containing three spaced stars, or just a blank line
between paragraph seven and paragraph eight, to let the reader
know to change gears. Or start paragraph eight with a warning
phrase such as "Ten years later..."; "After traveling
to Africa..."; or, if Mr. French is talking to the Swahili
witch doctor while Buffy and Jody are still doing their scene
off stage: "Meanwhile..." All of these will cue the
reader to expect a change.
What takes more
effort to fix is a total lack of time and place in the story --
when the writer has neglected to describe when or where the story
takes place; there is no setting, only action (or talking heads)
taking place against a big, empty gray backdrop that should be
full of sights and sounds and smells.
If this is what
your story lacks, then you have to go back and fill in the details,
taking the time to add the scenery and characters' perceptions
that will make the story come to life in your reader's mind.
This takes time.
It also requires effort and skill, because you can't just create
setting by means of an "information dump." You have
to weave these details into the story so that they add to its
flavor without being obvious.
Why
Is This Happening
If the reader
is asking why or what, your story could have some serious problems.
If the reader doesn't know why your character is doing something,
it's because you haven't established a motive. Motive is what
moves a story forward. It's fundamental to successful storytelling.
Is evil Dr. Death
trying to kill Bob Hero simply because Dr. Death's a nasty guy?
The reader isn't going to buy into a one-dimensional character
like that for very long. Readers expect more from you; they're
investing their time in your story, and if they can't figure out
a good reason why Dr. Death's out to get Bob Hero, then they're
not going to care much about these characters, for one, and they're
not going to put much stock in your credibility as a storyteller,
for another. They'll likely get bored, get impatient, put your
story down, and walk away.
Establishing
motive involves developing character and revealing pertinent background.
Look around you; study people. Why is that little girl screaming
and stamping her foot in the grocery store? She's throwing a tantrum,
yes. But why? Because her mother won't buy her a candy bar. By
throwing a tantrum, the little girl is hoping to get her own way,
to get the candy bar. Perhaps it worked before. This is motive.
It gives action meaning and characters depth. It gives the story
a reason. Make sure the reader knows why your characters are doing
what they're doing; why events are unfolding as they are.
If your reader
doesn't know what's going on, you may have some heavy rewriting
to do. Confusion of this sort usually flags plot holes or worse,
no plot at all. It can also arise from poorly choreographed action
sequences, or poorly written dialogue.
Streamlining
Dialogue
Dialogue is easy
enough to fix. If the reader doesn't know what the characters
are talking about, it could be because the characters' conversations
are fragmented, disjointed -- not all there. Perhaps the writer
was concentrating too hard on making the conversation fit what's
expected of stereotypical characters -- the hardboiled detective
and the tough broad, say, trading lines like "There's a cool
million in this for you if you play your cards right"; "Sure
doll, don't sweat it." What are these people talking about?
This is dialogue for the sake of effect alone; there is no real
transfer of information. Or, perhaps the writer hasn't translated
enough of the conversation inside his head to the page -- the
reader is getting only part of the conversation, and it doesn't
make any sense.
Try this: have
two friends "play parts" and read aloud one of the conversations
between two of your characters. You just sit and listen; supply
no prompts or information. Does the conversation you hear make
sense to you? Does it make sense to your two friends? Ask them
to interpret what they just read out loud. What do they think
they were just talking about? If they don't know, rewrite.
Sequence
and Logic
If a reader comes
away from your action sequence with his or her head spinning,
you will have to look at the sequence and make sure it's just
that -- a sequence: one action logically following another, step
by step. Try mapping out the sequence, to make sure you didn't
miss describing a step in the action, and also to make sure the
action taking place is physically possible. Write each step down
in point form as you see it unfolding in your head. Now write
each step down as you wrote it in your story, and compare the
two. If there's anything missing, or out of order, rewrite your
sequence, referring to your map to keep on track.
If the reader
doesn't know what your story is about, you're in trouble. Look
at your story. Is it a story? Do events flow logically one into
another to a satisfying conclusion, or does nothing really happen?
Do characters wander from scene to scene without doing or accomplishing
anything? If this is the case, it may be best to scrap the whole
thing and start over with a definite goal in mind. Try writing
an outline of the story you want to tell, and then use that outline
as a guide to keep you on track. Take the time to plan, to develop
characters, to plan the sequences of cause and effect that move
those characters forward and thus make a story.
If there's a
hole in the story's plot, the reader will also stumble over "what."
A plot hole is like a gap in logic: the effect can't possibly
have been caused by that action; stimulus does not produce the
most realistic response; the basic facts are wrong, and so on.
When a reader
hits a plot hole, they stop believing what the writer is telling
them. They start saying things like "If the houses are built
entirely of stone, how can the whole city burn to the ground?"
or "If they just traveled one hundred miles in ten minutes,
what kind of super-horses are these people riding?"
If those flaws can't be fixed
with a logical explanation, then the story has to be redesigned.
If your whole story is based on a premise that doesn't stand up
to reader scrutiny, it will crumble.
Make
sure you've given your readers all of the 5Ws -- who, when, where,
why and what -- and they'll "see" your story as you
do.
This Article was found at: http://www.articleblast.com/
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